Thursday, May 9, 2013

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die. - Mel Brooks

WEIGH IN NIGHT LAST NIGHT
LOSS OF 2.1kg !!!!
BOOM BOOM BABY !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have NO idea how this has occurred. Some time during the week the Fat Sucking Fairy has snuck into my room & stuck a hose into my bum & sucked out some fat... that or the hideous mangy flu that I had may have had a positive side-effect and caused my body to go into some sort of weird kind of calorie burning shock.  I was positive I would have a gain.. not just because of my rancid eating habits of late... but because of my beautiful recently acquired cold sore on my bottom lip. Oh yes the totally feral gum herp I had a fortnight ago has now spread to my lip. I could swear that this horrible throbbing attachment weighs at least 1.5 kilos itself.  Not happy.
I can't even wear any red lippie!!!!! SHOCK HORROR !!!!
I just had to put this weird clear sticky circle thing over it which is meant to make it look inconspicuous but instead I think makes people stare at my face & think "Why has she got a wet hole punch sticker on her lip? Should I tell her? Shit Don't make eye contact Shit "
I seriously feel like taking to my face with cheese grater. I'm popping Vitamin C tabs like a junkie at a rave and am considering buying a mega tub of L-Lysine from Chemist Warehouse and bathing in it.
In the mean-time "Don't Look at Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!".


 
So ANYWAYS This is what my weight loss/gain looks like so far.
 
WEEK ONE WEIGH IN 90.1kg                 
WEEK TWO 90.6kg GAIN .5kg
WEEK THREE:  88.8kg LOSS 1.8kg
WEEK FOUR 89.6kg GAIN .8kg TTOM
WEEK FIVE 89.1kg LOSS .5kg
WEEK SIX 89.5kg GAIN .4kg
WEEK SEVEN:  87.7kg LOSS 1.8kg
WEEK EIGHT:  89.6kg GAIN 1.9kg TTOM
WEEK NINE: didn't weigh in
WEEK TEN: didn't weigh in
WEEK ELEVEN:  87.5kg LOSS 2.1kg
WEEK TWELVE:  TTOM
TOTAL LOST 2.6KG
 
MY GOD PEOPLE HAVE YOU NOTICED A PATTERN HERE !!!!
 
I always seem to have a massive loss in the week before that bitch Auntie Flo comes to visit!!!!
It's like my body says "Here Vicki have a little ray of sunshine in your life, feel ever so light & fluffy & happy for a week. Look how loose your work pants feel ... ..... just before I peel back the lining of your uterus with a hacksaw and cause your lower back to feel like you've been in a hideous car accident and I bloat out your guts like you are nine months pregnant with biohazardgas. You're welcome   :)  ".
 
Thankfully it is Friday today. I am SO happy it is the weekend. I can't WAIT to have a sleep in.
I've organised my menu & exercise plan for the week and will be doing the food shopping this arvo.
I was a Little Miss Teacher's Pet last night at WW because I had my weekly plan with me and I showed our fabulous Leader Toni would then passed it around the class. I'm such a suck-up. LOL
I function SO much better when I have a list or a plan.
This weekend will be spent sleeping, cleaning up the house a bit, washing the stinky pooches, going out for tea with the MIL for Mum's day, doing some exercise and going to see the awesome band West Texas Crude play at our local barbershop 5 O'clock Shadow. Hopefully I will have time to get in some much needed chillin'.
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND EVERYBODY!
BE SAFE
XOXOXOXOX
My new clothes hanger..... I mean exercise bike.
So fits in with our vintage/retro lounge room.... not.
THIS WEEK'S PLAN

THIS MONTH'S MOTIVATIONAL MATERIAL


1 comment:

  1. Wow you look totes organised. I have hit the dreaded plateau... Sooo annoying! Have a great weekend darl

    ReplyDelete